Is it to be as it was, a second time around? Is my heart to bleed as profusely as the last time, and thicker, and colder, and with more despiration than anything? I've given up so much... I have sacrificed so much... and I'm not even allowed to ask for a second chance. I'm baffled. Dumbfounded. I'm stunned, and I'm sorrowful. I cannot see the light as it once was; a dazzling amount of joy to illuminate my world. Now, it is a harsh, burning, annoying reminder of my future without the one whom I cherish above all others. The one whom I know in my heart was meant to be there forever... its my misgivings, and my cowardice, my foolishness that has destroyed it all... I have nothing left. What had been growing for three months so harshly discarded without my even knowing it was there, which planted its own seed of hatred, anxiety, depression and isolation...
Fuck my life.
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